damn trimspa's expensive

so i bought hydroxycut instead. i was reading the label and it said 1 pill has as much caffeine as 2 cups of coffee. how insane is that? so i started taking hydroxycut last night with dinner. already took my second pill. it does kinda make you loopy. but oh well, anything for those last 5 lbs.

i can't believe i'm doing this...

but i've decided to go on trimspa. i just want to lose mebbe 5 lbs tops within the next two weeks. is that too much to ask? i just refuse to eat, you know? *sigh*

i can't believe i'm doing this. this is what i get for having 3 ex's all at the same wedding. dammit.

fed up with myself

going to go running today after work. no excuses.

eating 1 running 0

*sigh* should i even pretend that i like doing this anymore? eating won. i should just accept it. :( *hangs head in shame*

how bad do i want it?

i'm beginning to question that. no matter what i try to motivate myself, it's absolutely impossible to get myself to go out before or after work. i feel as if i'm being pulled 15 different directions, it's making it absolutely impossible to fit in working out. i need to become structured again. *sigh*

i tried my bike the other day, and it totally cut right into my crotch that i was completely uncomfortable. my bro moved it down another inch by taking off the rear reflector, but it's still too high... :( maybe god's telling me i should never ride a bicycle?

i am an unmotivated bastard...

i need something to motivate me. this money thing is just not working. any ideas?